


traded places

by planetundersiege



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, AtLA, Gen, Gift Exchange, Guilt, Hurt/Comfort, Nonbender Katara (Avatar), Sibling Bonding, Waterbender Sokka (Avatar), Wordcount: 1.000-3.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:35:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27161212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/planetundersiege/pseuds/planetundersiege
Summary: “It feels like I always mess things up, every time I try to protect you, I can’t do it, you end up protecting me instead. I want… to be an equal. And I want to be able to protect you Sokka, you’re my brother, but I can’t even do that.”[Nonbender Katara, Waterbender Sokka]
Relationships: Katara & Sokka (Avatar)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10
Collections: Fic In A Box





	traded places

**Author's Note:**

  * For [firelord65](https://archiveofourown.org/users/firelord65/gifts).



Katara let out a heavy groan filled with anger as she threw her sword away, it hitting the training dummy and cutting it in half. The sound of it hitting the ground was like a thump, and when the sword hit it, it simply sounded like abused steel, no way to treat a sword at all. In fact, most warriors would give her an unapproving stare for being so careless with her weapon.

But she couldn’t help it, her emotions having taken over a long time ago, making her mind twist and turn while parts of her body had been shaking, not knowing what to do. She felt so many different ways about herself and didn’t even know where to start, and she despised it. She hadn’t gotten a good nights sleep in several days, and as each day passed, Aang’s inevitable battle with the firelord came closer and closer, way too close for her own comfort. 

And it made her doubt herself and her own skills, how was she even supposed to help when the time came?

After yet another sleepless night, way before the sun had risen, she had simply decided to train to get her mind off that, to feel anything other than like a bad and useless person not being able to contribute. After all, the most logical thing on her mind had of course been practicing her skills. If she would only get better, then maybe she would be able to help the others, one day.

It had been hours, her arms were aching and har palms were sore, she knew they would blister after having spent so long practically clutching the sword like it was life and death, which it was in the long run. And not only that, she had also hit and kicked the dummy over and over, making her legs and knuckles sore when she practiced hand to hand combat, but she had done her best to not think of the pain at all. To be good, she would need to protect everyone like she had always done back home, it had been her job since she was a little girl and she hated to no longer be in control. Her own feelings of pain, her whole body, it wasn’t important in the long run and she knew it.

But now, as her body ached and her anger had gotten worse, she just needed a break even if she didn’t want to. So, she sat down on the ground and thought back on everything, the reasons  _ why _ she needed to be strong in the first place. To be able to help her friends in battle, and to protect her brother. Even if Sokka was older than her, and could protect himself with waterbending, a part of her still said that if he ever got hurt, it would be her fault, like when she had ran away from the scene to get their father back when their mom had gotten killed, protecting Sokka by saying that she was the last waterbender of the tribe and not him.

If she had only been quicker, or been able to help back then, everything could have been so different. Her family could have still been complete and happy, and she wouldn’t have felt the guilt of not having been able to do anything. A picture perfect family she had loved, being broken by the cruel reality of war.

That was the true reason she fought tooth and nail, training as much as she could to master several fighting styles, both with and without weapons, to be of just a tiny bit of use. But in the end, it was always Aang, Sokka and Toph that saved everything and kept Katara safe, and she hated it.

It was like she was a tiny turtleduck in need of constant supervision to not be eaten by a platypusbear who visited the pond for an easy snack, unable to help fending off any major treats.

She was just  _ there _ , and despised it more than she would ever be able to put into words. It was like a burning flame inside of her body that tried to suffocate her, taunting her for her very existence.

Whenever she closed her eyes, she felt the cold air against her cheeks as she had spent hours out in the cold sun of the water tribe, practically smelling the fish her mother would cook, and remembered the cold nights filled with warm cuddles and mommy kisses. Her old life, her childhood innocence. It was unfair that all of that had been ripped away, without her having the ability to help or change a thing. She had been helpless, and all of her told her that she was still in that state, constant helplessness no matter what she tried to do.

She let out a scream, letting all of her frustration out as she clenched her fists, just wanting to scream at something, or anyone, just to be seen for once. She just wanted to help, so, so much.

“Katara?”

Hearing her name out of nowhere caused her to immediately jump up, turn around, grab at the sound as she held tightly and twisted to make sure whoever talked to her wouldn’t be able to escape. And it wasn’t until she heard Sokka complain that her grip hurt that she realized it had been him who had called out for her. She immediately let him go, just a bit too hard out of reflexes, and Sokka fell to the ground.

“Ouch.”

“Sokka, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to.”

She saw how he slowly stood up, his hand stroking over his back for a few seconds, probably being where he hurt himself in the fall. Thankfully, she knew nothing would be broken by the look of his motions.

“It’s fine, it was my own fault for sneaking up behind you instead of just going to you, I guess.”

“No, it was my fault. I’m just so stupid and should have realized it was you, ugh, why does this keep happening?”

She groaned and pulled at her hair, hating how everything progressed. Of course she hurt her brother, the one person she wanted to protect the most, she felt like a big mess and didn’t know what to think.

“What keeps happening?”

“Everything.”

“Can you please tell me? I woke up to get some water, the sun isn’t even up, and I heard your sword hit the ground, see the training dummy being out of commision forever, and I hear you scream.”

“Everything is okay, okay?”

“Katara, you’re a bad liar. I can see it from miles away, something is  _ not _ okay, and I want to help you.”

“That’s the problem.”

“What?”

“I can never do  _ anything. _ I’m doing my best, training so many styles of combat to be of use, but I never am. It’s always you and the others protecting me. I can’t bend, and I feel like I’m slowing everyone down by not having a useful skill. Aang is the avatar, Toph is an eartbender, you’re a waterbender and the smartest person I know, you come up with the best plans and inventions, and I’m just here. I can’t do anything, I’m just slowing everyone down the more I try, and it hurts.” she said, looking down at the ground, refusing to meet her brother’s eyes as she kept clenching her fists. “It feels like I always mess things up, every time I try to protect you, I can’t do it, you end up protecting me instead. I want… to be an equal. And I want to be able to protect  _ you _ Sokka, you’re my brother, but I can’t even do that.”

She took a deep breath, doing her best not to cry as she felt her own protecting walls being teared down with a hammer, exposing her inner thoughts and vulnerability to her brother, the person she cared the most about. Her  _ family _ . She couldn’t cry infront of him, that way he would see how weak she actually was, he wouldn’t think she would be able to protect anyone.

Sokka was silent for a few moments, and when he spoke up, Katara heard a crack in his voice as he tried to speak, so, he took a few more seconds to collect himself.

“Katara, I had no idea you felt this way. You always seem so confident and sure of yourself, and you always help us with so much. Nothing like this ever crossed my mind. I’m sorry if we’ve all made you feel bad, it wasn’t intentional.”

“How have I been able to help Sokka? Tell me because I can’t figure it out no matter how hard I think back.”

“You’re literally the best of us at hand to hand combat, you know all these different types of moves with weapons and by yourself, and you’re able to take down so many people so quickly. Watching your moves made me improve my bending to try something new.”

“But I can’t even take down benders. You know it”

“Sure you can, I’ve seen you do it a lot. Maybe not as many as nonbenders, but that goes to all of us. It’s way harder to win a fight against some firebenders, no matter if you have bending or not, it’s like that for me too. But you’re so quick and smart and know how to move in battle, you’ve saved our butts so many times without even realizing it. You’re also really good at calming everyone down and making us stick together, especially after we fight. You make the team stick together, and that’s so important.” Sokka said, and as Katara looked up, she saw a smile on his face and a look in his eyes that showed that he must speak the truth, even if she didn’t want to admit it, and felt like it was wrong. 

But Sokka wouldn’t lie, she knew him. The ache in her stomach from all her mixed emotions kept on changing, confusing her even more. He said one thing, but her mind another. She just wanted some clarity.

“But…”

“No buts sister. Trust me, everyone here loves you and appreciate you and everything you do. We all know you’re probably the strongest one of us, while we have an easier time with bending, we can all see the true willpower in you, because you actually fight with your body and train like crazy, it’s really impressive and I’m proud of you. We all are. So please, never think of yourself as lesser than us just because you’re a nonbender.”

“How can you see me like that?”

“How could I ever see you as anything else when you prove how talented you are literally every day? You don’t need bending to be a powerful fighter, and you are the perfect example for that, you make us believe in the cause and to never give up, no matter how hard the problem is. You’re an inspiration Katara, and you’re the best little sister a guy could ask for.”

“Don’t try to flatter me, you won’t get off your chores, it is your turn to clean Appa.”

“That’s not why I said it. I am genuinely proud of you and how far you’ve come. Your fighting has improved and you put a lot of work into it, but please, you need to relax too. You’re only human, and your body won’t like it if you push it to its limits. You need some rest like everyone else.”

Katara hated to admit that Sokka was right about the rest part, her body was practically screaming at her to stop and to relax for a bit, getting proper time to recover after spending so long just crunching her abilities to improve. But she had never let herself relax, her mind saying she wasn’t worthy of it yet, that she had so much more to improve before she could even think about it.

She knew it wasn’t healthy in the long run, and just gave him a simple nod and muttered an “okay” back to him. And as she reflected on what he had said, she realized that her body was aching a lot more than what she had previously thought, having repressed it all for more training, to get her minds off of everything.

“Promise me you’ll take it easy for a few days.” Sokka said, and she nodded again, even though she didn’t want to.

“I’ll try.”

“No, not try. You will do it, if I find you punching away or slicing up another dummy I’ll confiscate your weapons, okay?”

“Ugh, fine.”

“That’s it. Come on, the sun isn’t even up yet, but I can make you some breakfast, and then you’ll go back to sleep and sleep in for as long as you want too, and need. I’ll tell the others to not disturb you unless we get attacked, okay?”

Sleeping in sounded so tempting, but at the same time, it made her feel like she didn’t contribute. But all of her limbs were heavy, so she would actually listen this time.

  
“Okay, thank you.”

“No problem, and remember, I’m always proud of you.”


End file.
